The Spectacular Narrative Collapse of Theresa May

Theresa May currently shares many parallels with Armando Ianucci’s BBC comedy ‘The Thick of It.’ I’m fairly sure May’s “omnishambles” of a General Election campaign and her series of bungled interviews, policies and initiatives were what Ianucci was aiming for in crafting the character of Nicola Murray and many of the other hapless, shambolic government ministers. It isn’t difficult to imagine many blunt ‘conversations’ between Lynton Crosby and May during the campaign resembling Peter Capaldi’s Malcolm Tucker in a sweary rant on the sheer levels of incompetence exhibited by any one of the characters on the show. I’m also reminded of Tucker’s speech to the minister Hugh Abbot in the first series of the show.  Something along the lines of, “People love it when you go (resign) a bit early. They say, “Oooh I wasn’t expecting that. You don’t see that much anymore.”” What follows is a lot of desperate attempts by Abbot to save his own skin rather than immediately resigning. He laments, “My optimum resignation window has gone.” When he eventually goes to resign, he’s been ‘beaten to it’ by junior minister Dan Miller, who has quickly learned the art of the strategic resignation. Miller will go onto become party leader in the final series. As Wilde said, “Life imitates art far more than art imitates life.” In May’s failure to resign on Friday morning she has ensured she has been consigned to the political dustbin of history. She remains Prime-Minister in name only and is a political person non-grata. She is a walking irrelevance. Her continued clinging to power only serves to further damage her and her own party through her toxicity. She committed political suicide clasping to her manifesto. Described as the ‘vaguest suicide note in history.’ If this was fiction, hers would be a narrative collapse. Usually the point in a story where a character dies and they can no longer serve the narrative in any constructive way. If you are in the business of writing fiction, there is always a price to be paid for killing off a character. Usually it is in the form of ‘hitting a brick wall.’ To circumvent and recover from a narrative collapse. A new narrative must be formed in its place. How big the price is anyone’s guess or what the new narrative will be is anyone’s guess. I’m sure fans of Marx’s material dialactics will have some tantalising ideas though.

On the subject of narrative, the author Robert Harris in today’s Sunday Times compared Brexit to a disaster drama. Harris pointed out that the secret to any great disaster drama is to set a countdown to said disaster (Article 50) and then shorten it to ramp up the tension (calling a general election shortly after). Now seeing as we’ve had the person we presumed to be the main character in this drama commit hari kari ten minutes in, we can safely say, you couldn’t write this stuff. 

For Our Safety and Security, Theresa May Must Go

You can tell a lot about a person by looking at who their friends are. Currently, the weak, incompetent, increasingly isolated Theresa May’s only political friends are the bigoted, despotic and much derided Donald Trump, the sectarian, racist, homophobic, climate-change denying DUP who are supported and heavily affiliated with various Loyalist terrorist groups and the ugly Saudi Arabian regime who are currently responsible for ongoing horrific murderous actions in Yemen and are responsible themselves for funding terror. We can form a picture of Theresa May from this that her politics are repellant and absolutely toxic.

Yesterday, after the worst political miscalculation since her Conservative predecessor David Cameron called the EU referendum, Theresa May should have resigned. Instead, she has opted to brassneck it out and in the process, again, jeopardise the peace, safety and security of the British and Irish Isles by doing a deal with the bigoted menace that is the DUP. 

After twenty years of peace in Ulster, May is now severely jeopardising the Peace Process by placing herself into a corner in a desperate bid to cling to power. Britain by the terms of the Good Friday Agreement is supposed to be a neutral arbiter in the North of Ireland. As of yesterday, this can no longer be the case. Theresa May has chose what is politically expedient for herself over the hard won peace and the safety and security of the people of the province of Ulster and on the British mainland. This prospect of a resurgence in conflict in the province of Ulster should horrify everyone in the electorate and in Britain and Ireland.

Of course, this wouldn’t be the first time Theresa May has severely jeopardised the safety and security of the British people. After six years as Home Secretary and a year as Prime-Minister where she has overseen cutting 20,000 police with her Conservative government overseeing a cut in armed forces, this year alone, despite having had seven attacks in the last fifteen years on British soil, under Theresa May’s watch we have endured three major terrorist attacks in the space of three months. For someone who talks tough on crime and terror, Britain is the least safe on her watch it has been for decades. This is unlikely to improve. She has shown herself to be a weak, incompetent politician who is completely indecisive as shown by her countless U-Turns. The sooner this omnishambles of a ‘Prime-Minister’ is ousted from her office – likely by her own MP’s in a fashion that will make what the Conservative Party did to Margaret Thatcher look like nursery class – the better and safer Britain will be for it.

For the love of God, Theresa, just go.